Who knows what's waiting around the corner?

Insert girly scream here: Eeeeeeeeeeee! This has little to do with writing-writing and more to do with finding various outlets for creativity.

Last year when I started as the Christian Education Director of my church I was brimming with ideas. One of the things I wanted to do was create a newsletter for the kids - online. Our Youth Director, at the time, pointed me to a website that helps you easily create websites for free, and a new passion was born! I created a website for the Sunday School and the church at large. I don't claim to be an expert, Weebly makes it easy, and it still amuses me when people use my name and "Webmaster" in the same sentence because I'm soooo far from that, but still, it's pretty cool. (I mean, I bow to my cousin Ben, who's the co-owner of Skylite Creative check out their website under my fave sites/blogs, their stuff is truly outstanding).

I am constantly updating the two church websites and learning more and more as I go (one day I really will get some clue about HTML coding, just not this day). From the experiences I gained from building those sites led to my Club Volleyball Director actually hiring me to build a website for the club. My latest endeavor is creating a website for my husband's friend and their fireworks business.

...Back to that girlish scream, though. I just might find myself with a new website gig! Eeeee! Nate's (firework fella) mom-in-law wants to talk to me about creating a site for her business. YES! Seriously, I was giddy with excitement over the prospect of building another site. I'm beyond excited to have the opportunity to continue growing in this particular branch of the creative process.

So think happy thoughts for me, hopefully she will like the things I've done so far and...wait for it...Want to hire me! Sigh!

Preschool: To send or not to send?

My latest Examiner article is about whether or not to send your child to preschool. This is a conundrum my husband and I find ourselves going back-and-forth on.

On the one hand, she's an only child so the idea of getting her used to being around other children and a teacher in a classroom setting is tempting to us. She's potty trained so she gets to start attending our church's Sunday School Preschool and I'm fascinated to see how she'll do there.

My sister and sister-in-law both took care of preschool for all seven of their collective children at home, nary a one went to preschool. However, I question my abilities in this arena. The times Abby and I have attempted to set out "Designated Preschool Time," have been grand failures. We both lose patience with each other. The last time we tried she got mad that she wasn't actually getting on a bus and going to a school like her cousins - even though I made our goal for the next day 100% clear. Apparently not. By the end of our 30 minute session (if that) she kept putting her head on the table pretending to be asleep. So you can see why I'd be a little concerned about her kindergarten readiness. Not to mention her fondness for pretending she doesn't know things she actually does. i.e. Colors. Don't even get me started.

I think the thing that is my greatest deterrent to actually sending her to preschool is the notion that she has plenty of time to be in school and I have so little time to be with her...Just the two of us. Flip the coin and you've got my biggest fear that she won't be ready for kindergarten if we don't send her. They practically have to be college ready when entering kindergarten these days! I exaggerate, but barely.

I'd love it if you'd check out the article and share your thoughts are on preschool. For the full article, click here.

Pancakes: In all their golden scrumptiousness

In the land of random writings, I'd say we're in store for the randomest. I'm sort of in a holding pattern regarding my regular writing stuff and I was, oddly enough, inspired by my pancakes today.

Pancakes for dinner, one of my favorite meals. I love making pancakes; I definitely love eating them, but most of all I love the memories that wash over me - from pulling out the recipe to pouring the batter onto the griddle.

Memories

The pancake recipe I use has been in my family for years and comes from the kitchen of my dad's mom. This recipe has spoiled all other pancakes for me. It was always a treat, the mornings we'd have pancakes, and even better when my mom would bust out the occasional breakfast for dinner.

Possibly the memories that stand out the most in my mind are those as I was becoming a teenager and all the midnight makings of pancakes with my best friend and introducing the awesomeness of this tradition to my cousin when she was visiting from Minnesota. There was a period where this friend and I went wild with experimenting with our pancakes - shapes, putting fruit in the batter, and it was here where I discovered the tummy teasing addition of cinnamon to the perfection that are these pancakes. Now there's a trick to the cinnamon, you've got to stir it in, you can't just sprinkle it on top and expect the same palate pleaser, no, stirring is where it's at.

But the memories that warm my heart the most? As I stand over the cooking pancakes watching the bubbles form and slowly pop, I think of my mom teaching me the fine art of making these heavenly creations. Reminding me to have patience, waiting for the last bubble to pop before flipping that golden circle. Last night in particular I was overcome by this as I shared these same words of wisdom for the first time with Abby. At three she will most likely not really remember this first lesson, nor is she old enough to be the flipper, but one day she will be, and she'll remember what I've taught her as she makes her first batch of pancakes.

What's to love?

• I love how things of the kitchen have the ability to link generations. At my mom's house I can pull out the original recipe in my grandmother's handwriting, somewhere is my recipe card from the first time I copied it, and in my house is the card I made when I got married.
• I love how if you aren't patient and wait for all the bubbles to pop, when you flip it, you'll see the results of your impatience as the golden brown will not have spread to that part of the pancake.
• I love making our own syrup to go along with all that yummy goodness - yet another thing that has been passed down and shared throughout our family over the years.

The recipe

Plain Pancakes
from the kitchen of Joan
2 eggs                                2 cups flour
2 cups milk                        6 teaspoons baking powder
1/3 cup oil                         1/4 cup sugar

*Heat your griddle to 250/300
*Using a whisk, mix together your liquid ingredients, then add your dry ingredients, mixing after each addition.
*If you want to add cinnamon as I do, using a measuring cup to pour your batter on the griddle, tap cinnamon into the batter and stir in. (I do it this way rather than adding to the batter so others can have plain pancakes if they prefer).

If I Could Remember Forever

In an effort to mix things up a little bit I'm sprinkling some of my 'Abby' writings in with my regular blog posts. One of my favorite Abby-inspired writings. Hope you enjoy...

If I Could Remember Forever...

The way her sweet little hand fits perfectly in mine…

The feel of her all snuggled into my neck…
The beautiful lope of her 2-year-old run & the swing of her arms as she sprints from moment to moment…
The perfection of her little hands in a prayerful pose…
The perfect pouty pucker she had as in infant that would erupt moments before the cry…
The look of pure joy & excitement over new accomplishments…
The delight in spotting birds & airplanes…
Her sweet baby breath on my neck & face as she slept…
The excitement on her face when mommy says, “Who loves an Abigail?” “I do, I do!” And her participation in this-shouting right along, ecstatically flinging both arms in the air…
The way she’ll cup her hands, hold out her arms, and in her sweet, little voice, say, “see me?” to anything she finds cute…
The first realization that it’s a wonderful thing to be barefoot in the grass…
How daddy’s hand could once cover her entire back…
The way she would constantly interrupt herself from nursing to bless mommy with beautiful smiles…
The look on her face after she throws a ball, it’s indescribable, but outstanding…
How she would grunt in her sleep as an infant-thus giving mommy & daddy piece of mind…
The sound of her feet running across the kitchen…
The sound of her feet hopping through the house…
The way she looks when she walks around on her tippy toes…
How, if asked to reach for the stars, she will do so with giddy anticipation of being tickled…
Her amazing ability to ignore without wavering…
The way she will roll to her tummy in the tub & declare herself to be “swimmin’!”…
The way she’ll choose the randomest of moments to snuggle, gently trailing her fingers along my arm…
Those sweet little hands grabbing your cheeks, followed by the sweetest of kisses…
How, about 95% of the time if you tell her, “my lips are puckered for you!” you will be rewarded with a smooch…
How, “Mommy, I hold you,” means, please carry me!!…
The beautiful sound of “I love you!” from such a small body…
Walking up the stairs hand-in-hand…

Wish me luck!

Photo by: cliff1066 via Flickr

*Deep breath* Progress has actually been made! I've spent the better part of the evening re-formatting and getting the Kibbe series ready to send off for consideration to one of two parenting magazines. Now that that's done I've got to muddle my way through my first ever query letter. I'm thinking that should be interesting. I know me, I agonize over each word in these kinds of letters, but I'm crazy excited to get this in the mail. Hopefully by noon tomorrow I can get this sent off and settle in for what I am assured will be a long wait. (Made longer, I'm sure, by my inevitable impatience).

The next step is to continue looking for other outlets to submit writings to - new and old pieces. I've discovered an outstandingly helpful website:  http://www.freelancewriting.com/, which is where I was able to obtain the writing guidelines for the two parenting magazines I'm deliberating over.

I might be on the verge of having 'Rejection' be my middle name, but I'm so ready to dive in! Wish me luck - one baby step at a time!

Hit the Panic Button!

Gotta start somewhere...
I think I've glossed over the fact that I'm not exactly rolling in the dough with my Examiner gig - and that's okay, I feel like I've got to start somewhere and this is a good way to gain exposure. However, I was wandering through the Examiner Community boards - where the Examiner writers can go to vent, troubleshoot, seek advice, etc. and happened upon a topic that sent my heart down to my toes...

Plus or minus?
The initial ponderment in the writer's topic was regarding whether or not writing for Examiner was a boon or a detriment when trying to get other writing jobs. Several individuals claimed their affiliation with Examiner cost them several jobs, which I find CRAZY! And it sent me swirling into panic mode. Shouldn't a person be judged on their caliber of writing, not who they are writing for? So now I'm freaking out...

Where do I go from here?

On the one hand I really enjoy the freedom I have in writing for the Examiner. I like that my topic is so broad that the sky is practically the limit. Feedback would be awesome, but I knew going in that's not the way this worked. I don't like the idea of flooding my Examiner page with articles simply to generate traffic. I want to create quality content that I can be proud of. I want to be able to send people to my Examiner page and feel confident that what they're going to see are well written and well thought out articles.

On the other hand, I don't want to write about just anything (i.e. flooding my page with oodles of articles), I want to write about things that matter, things that could legitimately be of use to another parent or family. Was I wrong to worry only about me and my little corner of the world and thinking this is a legitimate starting off point for me?

Tell me true
Who knows if anyone is actually reading this yet, but if you are, I would greatly appreciate your honest feedback. Do I have what it takes to move beyond my Examiner page? What do you think about what I'm posting? Am I being naive in thinking what I'm writing and how I'm writing is more important than who I'm writing for? I'd put this out there in Examiner forum land, but frankly my stomach gets all jittery just thinking about the responses I would get.

I've decided where I'm going to submit my Kibbe series to, I guess that'll tell me something...Moral of the story: I think I'm going to avoid the forums for awhile...

The Kibbe Series

The Kibbe Family. Thanks again!

Tomorrow my series on the Kibbe family will be all wrapped up. As I've mentioned this is my first attempt at interviewing someone and putting their thoughts into something meaningful. I don't know if this is my forte, but I'm hoping their story can touch people who don't know them as well as those who do.

I'd like to get their story out there beyond the reach of the Examiner, but I'm still trying to figure what outlet would be best. I honestly don't know where to start...While I worry about this story and its basic avoidance of the 'local' aspect, I still felt like this was a story more than worth sharing. I can't imagine the fears and doubts one must feel when learning their child will be born with any kind of condition. Ironically, on the other side of the coin, in discussing the series with my sister-in-law, she noted when they were going through their issues with their first pregnancy years ago, she remembers wishing it could've been something like Down syndrome, which would've meant their baby could've survived. I guess it's all a matter of perspective.

I'm excited to publish the final segment - as I told Mary when I sent it to her for approval, I was by far the most nervous sending her that section than any of the others as it was the most subjective. She loved it, and I'm hoping you will too!

On a side - and completely unrelated -  note I have gotten started on my 'book,' (it seems so lofty to say it since it'll definitely take time to bust this out, can we say, 'still in the infant stages!'), but I'm now deliberating over whether or not this should be a chapter book or a series of smaller books. Bum, bum, buuuummmm! Decisions, decisions.

30 plus 1 things to love about Abby

One of my first Abby writings, hope you enjoy. In an effort to mix things up a bit, I'm tossing in some of my favorite Abby writings, hope you enjoy.

Occasionally I play a game with Abby where I just start randomly listing all the things I love about her so I thought I'd see where it takes me.

 Oh how I love Abby, let me count the ways...

1. I love how she can be totally cautious with some things and in the next moment find something to be fearless about.

2. Those beautiful blue eyes
3. I love the way the way Abby uses her tongue-when she's thinking or working hard on something, out it comes. When she's saying sort of a long word that she can't quite get fully, she'll waggle her tongue around to help the cause, like with toodlydoo!
4. Her laugh
5. The way she just randomly lifts up her shirt and then acts all embarrassed about it
6. The way she gets her groove on-she's quite the dancer
7. How she just has to brush her teeth when she sits on the potty
8. What a sweet little mama she is to her dolls & toys

9. The way she just LOVES her grandpas, but takes issue with most other men-until she gets warmed up, that is

10. How it takes her awhile to decide how she feels about things-she doesn't tend to just jump right in. For example, her toy vacuum, her elmo doll-things that are loud-she will often watch first, try later.

11. The way she asks you if you're okay if you cough or make any other abnormal noise. "you okay mama, okay?" Insert your name there-she's very concerned

12. Her hugs

13. Her sweet, face-holding kisses

14. The way she jumps

15. How she likes to play hide-&-seek, but waits in scared anticipation of being found!

16. How dramatic she is-she's definitely her mama's daughter!

17. The way I can't even think about getting her out of the tub unless she "shows" me she's ready by trying to drain the tub herself.

18. Her facial expressions. She's been SO expressive since she was a wee one!

19. The way she says her words, particularly how she kind of draws out her vowels.

20. When she howls after she makes a basket-it's hilarious!

21. Listening to her talk and sing as she's waking up in the mornings.

22. How she'll call for mama at first, but if I don't come quickly enough it soon becomes, "BECCA!!"

23. Those gorgeous blonde curls.

24. How "see me" equals hold me, sit with me in Abby land.

25. The way she just randomly crosses her ring finger with her middle finger when she's sitting idly. (I actually do the same thing-though I never noticed it until I realized Abby did it as well)

26. The way she likes to find a way to put her feet up so she can kick back & relax (she's done this since she was a baby)

27. How she likes to store her specials in various places-the seat of her bike, the designated kid drawer in the kitchen, on her special shelf in the living room

28. How she went nearly 2 years of her life without truly special sleep buddies & now she's practically running out of room for all the things in her bed!

29. When I ask her if she wants to pick out a movie, she'll pull the movies out & instead of looking at the front, she'll study the back as if she's actually reading it.

30. How "amens," means say prayers and she'll want to say "amens" at any old time during the day-not just bedtime.

31. Finally, I love her because she's Abby, the greatest gift I've ever been blessed with!

--Written April 3, 2009

A little over a year later, many of things remain the same, but it's amazing to see the way she's grown in other areas. The one that springs most quickly to mind is the leaps and bounds she's made in regards to her shyness. She's still the last of the great ignorers, but she works really hard to push herself out of her box, it's a pretty amazing transformation to watch. 

Let the Abby-isms begin!

As promised, the funnies that make up life with Abby.


This was being written near the 11:00 p.m. hour last night and yes, my child was still awake. I heard coughing so as I'm heading upstairs to get her some cough syrup, she meets me at her door. I've clearly surprised her with my astute offering of medicine, as she eases the door closed behind her, stepping over the threshold. So she takes her medicine, declares herself to be feeling better - "I better now mom, thanks." As I start to grab her hand to tuck her back into bed, she quickly assures me that it's better she do it herself. "Are you sure honey, don't you want me to tuck you in?" "No mommy, I good...(slightly panicked) Don't go in there." Mmm, ruined it for yourself kid. So now I'm giving her a few minutes to see just where this is heading - clearly not back to bed. Apparently she was playing and had decided to throw every last toy in her room all around - party in Abby's room! 

Clearly not the face of a mischievously sassy girl.

Abby quote of the day: "Look mom, I a pirate!" Upon placing her duck on her shoulder.
Runner up: Coming up to me this afternoon, hands behind her back, she triumphantly declares, "I find footprints!" Huh? The look on her face coupled with those missing hands tells me more is to come...Sure enough, out pops a magnifying glass. Apparently she equates magnifying glasses with footprints, why I do not know, but perhaps I have a budding Sherlock Holmes on my hands.

How can I procrastinate, let me count the ways...

Avoidance, avoidance, avoidance! You know that 'serious' writing I want to do? Well, certainly one could say I'm not avoiding when you look at the series I'm doing on the Kibbe family for my Examiner page, but as I'm wrapping that up I am very aware of my brain constantly nagging at me to stop tossing things around in my brain and actually put those ideas on paper - okay computer screen, but you get my point. My brain can be quite sassy, by the way.

What am I avoiding you ask? I want to write a book. Am I living in crazy dream land thinking I could write a book? Are my goals too lofty thinking someone would want to publish said book? (You know if I ever actually focused enough to take my thoughts and put them to work). Ah, so meanwhile, I'm working on honing my craft, writing for the Examiner pondering my next move into different publications - no I still haven't submitted those darn children's stories/poems for the children's magazine publication. Don't say it! My brain is already yelling! I'm thinking I'm operating under a fear of rejection at this point. Life is pretty grand in writing for the Examiner, not lucrative mind you, but no one is approving my articles - I'm flying by the seat of my pants here. Certainly there are guidelines we have to follow, but they're not exactly restrictive. One might even say that this blog is yet another avenue for me to explore in procrastinating, but eh, I figure any time I spend writing is beneficial...Woo! Let me go crack open a window it's getting awfully thick in here.

I know it'll come, I've just got to let myself go to it and accept that it's going to take patience (something I seem to be in short supply of) as this book becomes a reality. Maybe no one will ever read it, but I owe it to myself to try. That's the premise of this blog, right? To follow my dream. That patience I need? I need to remind myself that this isn't one of my posts, articles, random writings that I can "whip out in ten minutes," as my sister is fond of saying. It's going to take time - time, re-writes, and, you guessed it, patience. Oh, and I suppose it would behoove me to shelve my procrastinator-type tendencies for a spell. That's a lifetime of training I'm trying to push away, good luck to me. Maybe my oldest nephew can be my motivation, the sheer excitement he has when we talk about this is infectious. So, here it is - I'm putting it out there: Goal 1: I will determine a pace that is legitimate and begin writing the opening tomorrow (how does one know how many pages per day is too little, too much...). I'll get back to you on where to go from here. Deep breath and GO!

Whew!

I'm in the midst of finishing my first series of articles complete with interview questions and all (insert cheesy smile, peppy voice, and thumbs up here) and I think my brain is about to go on the fritz! What I initially thought would be a four part series has grown into a five parter and frankly could've gone to six, but I figured I better stop somewhere before I have a book on my hands.

With the exception of today we've completed all the questions via e-mail. My first victims in helping me get this whole interview thing figured out are fortunately long-time friends of my sisters, thank you Mary and Justin for being oh so patient in this whole process.

The series chronicles the Kibbes from their learning of their youngest son's diagnosis of Down syndrome to where they are today and what they're looking forward to. Writing about their family has been interesting in that I thought I was relatively educated about Down syndrome, but it's a whole different ball game when what you know (or thought you know) is applied to an actual child and his family...

Part one is officially published and posted, so pop by my Examiner page and check it out!

My best critic

Tonight I realized I have the perfect sounding board living right under my own roof...One little miss Abigail bean.

I've been working on writing some things for a children's magazine/publication. It's this magazine for babies and toddlers six months to two years, but it's made out of board book material and has no staples, so it's really and truly for the wee ones.

Ironically, my main concern in writing for such a publication was writing something truly kid focused and my ability to write something that wasn't totally lame not to mention accidentally poaching from the many, many children's books I've read over the years. Finally, I realized I was doing that whole self-sabotage-y negative self-talk before I'd ever even tried. As my mom has always said, "You never know until you try." The irony here, of course, is that I've always wanted to be a children's book author...Moral of the story: Man up, bust out the creative thinking, and do some writing!

Back to Abby - thus far she's given me only rave reviews, but children are famously honest so I'm thinking I've found my new go-to girl. Her first review was: "Read it again mom!" Guess I ought to get over the butterflies in my tum and send it off. Keep your fingers crossed for me!

Living on the Edge

One might think from the title that I'm out there living dangerously, when in reality I'm merely busting out of the pack...sort of.

One of the perks of writing for Examiner.com (mostly it's a perk), is they have Community opportunities for the writers to bounce ideas off each other, get advice, vent, whatever - you get the idea. Yesterday while scanning through some of the various topics another writer was wondering if it's okay to, 'break the guideline of not writing our articles in first person.' Holy varied response Batman! For some writers writing in the first person is the most egregious writing faux pas an author could make. Gasp! As I'm reading the responses I felt vindicated by those who backed up the occasional use of first person, and feeling a bit chastised by those who find writing in the first person appalling.

Where is this going, you ask? A piece I wrote recently, following the 2010 Relay for Life, was written 100% from my perspective and totally first person. This article garnered me the most views to my page ever. I actually made more than a few pennies (not exaggerating), I was wildly excited. As I tell my family who thinks it's craziness the money we're (not) making - "You've gotta start somewhere." Writing for the Examiner might be worth pennies now, but I'm gaining invaluable experience, I'm getting my stuff out there, I'm building a portfolio, some people actually make money doing this (fairly certain this is not an urban legend)...The list goes on.

So, do me a favor, check out the Relay for Life article, let me know what you think - acceptable or not so much? If by chance you don't know me or my family, can you still relate to it? Did it make any impact? Below is a brief sneak peak at the article:

I was five-years-old when my father was diagnosed with cancer, nine when my grandfather died due to complications during a surgery for his cancer, twelve when my grandmother was diagnosed and told she had six-months to live, and was two days past my high school graduation when she succumbed to this vicious disease that gradually overtook her body. Save the specifics - my story is not unique. Cancer and the impact it has is far reaching and touches nearly every human being in one way or another...Read more

Getting Started

As a child I wanted to be a clown (mmmkay!), a teacher (I did actually major in this in college before finding a better fit), an artist (discovered I cannot draw), or an author. I love to write, love to write! It was only recently that I decided it was time to stop dreaming and wishing and start looking for opportunities to "write professionally."

My first jump into the land of paid publication was to look into a site that I'd frequently seen advertisements looking for writers. I have now been writing for the Billings edition of the Examiner.com as an Early Childhood/Parenting Examiner for just over a month. To check out my work with the Examiner, click here.  

My aunt writes professionally and has been offering much appreciated guidance as I've been pondering my next move in the vast land that is "publishing." She's a great source of encouragement and wisdom and she made me realize that I cannot rely on this one source, I've got to be putting more pieces out there - "It is only those people who say they want to be a writer and never do anything that fail. If you work diligently at it - it is a job - you will succeed." -Pat Hansen

I have started working on some children's pieces for a publication my aunt informed me of as well as sending off a letter of interest to a local magazine. Admittedly, the idea of my work being published in an honest-to-goodness magazine is rather mind-boggling, but 20 years after making that initial declaration of wanting "to be an author," I'm pushing aside the little voices of self-doubt and the time has come for me to admit this is something I want and it's time to go after it!

Join me, won't you, as I work to follow my dream.